Today I read Doctrine and Covenants section 112, a section given to Thomas B. Marsh, who at the time was the President of the Quorum of the Twelve of the Apostles. This section is before Thomas B. Marsh had his episode with his wife and the leaders of the church which caused him to apostatize for several years before repenting and returning to full fellowship.
The sad thing is, in this section, the Lord is trying to warn Thomas B. Marsh by telling him to avoid pride and to be humble and the Lord will take care of the rest. It is hard to leave things completely in the hands of the Lord. I had a problem doing that earlier in my life. After finishing college, I felt like I was adrift in a sea with no way to reach the shore. Up to that point in my life, I had a plan and followed it. I graduated High School and then served a mission. I then graduated college but the rest of my life did not fall into place. I did not get married for another 4 years and I was not finding a career in my chosen field. It was the first time in my life that I did not feel in control of my own destiny. And it was really hard for me to just let go and let the Lord pilot the course for me.
But as is always the case, once I stopped trying to be in control, the Lord took over and steered me in the direction that I needed to be. I had a really good time during those years and made some wonderful friends that are still near and dear to me and was able to spend an unprecedented amount of time with my family which now that I live over 300 miles away from them I appreciate even more. And the woman I would go on to marry? The first time I wanted to be married, right after my mission, she was only 16 years old. And the second big push I had for marriage in my life, after college she was only 19 years old and not ready for marriage at all. That's the problem with trying to control things we have no control over, we don't know and probably can't understand all the elements involved. I would also wager that if the Lord showed us the end from the beginning for our own lives, we would not take it very well. We would either have a real problem with what we are going to suffer, because we do not understand that it is the things that we suffer that shape us and turn us into who we ultimately will become.
That's the problem with pride, we think we know it all. Now, my parents will tell you that I was about as easy a teenager as one could ever hope for. I never rebelled, I didn't sneak out, and I was pretty obedient and did not do a lot of talking back, and yet, despite how good I was, I still made a lot of dumb decisions and caused my parents grief. And looking back, I can't understand why I thought I knew it all. I look back and see SO many things I wish I could do differently if I were allowed to go back with my knowledge I have now and do it over again.
But, knowing that we are the sum of all our experiences, even our sins, would any of us really want to change things in our lives knowing they were part of what shaped and molded us into the people we are today? It's a tough question, fortunately not one that requires an answer since it is not possible. Our choices have been made and the die has been cast and all we can do is decide who we are going to be going forward. It is up to us to decide how we will act, or in some cases if we will act at all or if we will only be acted upon.
I can say with certainty that the absolute best thing any of us can do is to cast pride away from us. Because one way or another, we need to be free of pride if we are to be exalted. The Lord is able, and willing, to help us but trust me when I say it is so much easier and preferable to do it ourselves. Because remember, with a few exceptions, the Lord doesn't just zap us and we are suddenly changed, rather He gives us experiences where we can cultivate the desired trait ourselves. Wouldn't it be better to choose to be humble ourselves and work on it a little bit each day? I think so. And it is one of those things that gets easier the more you do it. Pride is also one of those traits that once we are free of it, we look back and wonder why we did not do it sooner. It truly is a worthless trait and we would all be best served to be rid of it. I hope each of us can rid ourselves of pride and continue on in the journey of our eternal progression. Until tomorrow.
No comments:
Post a Comment